- Bruce Barton
18x24x2" Acrylic on Canvas 2017
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"From doormat to bitch"
Those of you, who know me, know my heart. I wear it on my sleeve, full of empathy and understanding. But this is where my challenge starts. Because of my healed yet readable heart, I want to be able to show support and share my strength, which, by the way, finding it, was a journey in itself. Because I’ve been through some trials of my own, I’ve become open-minded which helps me accept and understand, “Yes, shit happens.”
This is where the doormat part comes in. In my past, I was doormat but I didn’t realize it. Now, I tend to get stuck becoming a doormat but at least now I recognize it. My challenge continues. Because I still have to apply it to myself, I learned the difference between sympathy and empathy. Sympathy makes excuses and acceptance with no determination, where empathy is understanding and encouragement with no blame.
Here’s where the bitch part needs to show. Please understand that in the depths of my soul, being a ‘bitch’, a mean girl, tears me up inside, even when I’m standing up for myself. So, here I need to find balance. To make my heart happy, I want to help people, to stand beside them and support them during their journey to become a better self. Besides the satisfaction that only helping people can give, I hope that true gratitude will be one of their first steps to becoming a better self. (Is wanting to be appreciated a small part of my inner bitch peeking through?)
So, on one side of my life scale is my love for kicking struggles in the butt. The other side, are the essential things for my life; my husband, my children and friends, my businesses and my health. See, even on my list of the most important things in my life, my health is last... Still working on finding my balance. Because I tend to lean more to the doormat side of life, my goal is to ask myself in every situation, “Is this absolutely necessary for my relationships, my businesses, my health?”. I’ve heard the answer should be one of only two. The first is an enthusiastic “Hell yes!”. If it is not, if there is any grey area, the answer should be answered with just as much enthusiasm, “Hell no!”. Choose to do what is absolutely essential for your life.
January 10, 2017